For some reason my learning this month has primarily focused on addictions. There was Dr. Anna Lembke on the Knowledge Project. I’ve been working through Paul Chek’s 1-2-3-4 On Obesity, Addiction, and Disease. And reading through Codependent No More. Then I had a good conversation with my best friend talking about levels of thinking and knowing God. Chek went into the spiritual aspect of addiction the most. That addictions stems from an underlying lack of security in something. His definition of God is unconditional love. I find that this is a hard concept to accept because, outside of a theoretical concept, we never experience complete unconditional love. The experience of unconditional love I would describe as nirvana, feeling God’s presence, or tasting heaven.
So what does this have to do with addictions. Addictions are compulsive behaviors by definition. It’s our attempt to escape reality and the present moment. When I was on my child psychiatric rotation in medical school it was a humbling experience. Many of the experiences the patients were going through I identified with in my teenage years. My basic insight was the difference between them and me is they are trapped in the system that is disease labeling and medications. I wonder how many will ever escape that trap. The tracking that took place where they learned behaviors from one another reminded me of how people adjust in the prison system. It was an eye opening experience on the impact of environment. I personally identify compulsions for societally accepted things – exercise, personal finance, status and additional education. At times I do think this is causing deleterious effects on relationships and personal well being.
Anna Lembke recommended cutting out dopaminergic activities for at least 30 days and I’m looking forward to this Lenton season to drop coffee and alcohol. I’ve noticed a massive uptick over the past 3 years since the beginning of COVID in daily alcohol intake and I’ve cut it out a couple times for over a month the past couple years. What’s interesting is that I cut it out, start following my rule of none M-Th, then when I’m about to cut it out again I feel that I can do whatever I want prior to giving it up again. I’ve found it effective to create black and white rules for myself. No more than 3 drinks in a sitting, don’t drink M-Th and this has worked well for me because there’s no decision that needs to be made. I set short goals when starting this to just do this for 2 weeks to get over the hump.
What’s a healthy relationship with something? What is reasonableness? I think these questions may be focusing on the wrong thing. I think maybe the objective should be how can I get closer to living the life that I want to live. How can I improve my rules to be more in line with my values?
Chek has always been a proponent of finding your dream. Once you find your dream you’re less likely to succumb to outside pressures and chase an escape from your reality. In practice I find that many people completely lack long term thinking as they are trapped in the cycle of thinking day after day. The tool I’ve been using is the Wheel of Life and Dan John’s 5/2 Goal Setting to work with patients to help shape the dream. It provides enough framework for people to start guiding their lives.
I pray that I can help my patients struggling with addictions and co-dependency, but I think this will come more from me cleaning up my life and teaching by example.
Seeking Progress 